Today marks a big milestone for me.....I am just over half-way to my goal weight.
As of today I have lost 4 stones 1 lb (57lb/25.5kg).
This journey started on 2nd January and on that day I knew that I had a mountain to climb, my Everest. The journey so far has been full of ups & downs in my life, as well as my weight loss journey. Life can be so testing sometimes and I feel that I have managed to really test myself over the last 6 months. Previously I would have had an eating binge and scoffed bars of chocolate, family sized packets of crisps and take-aways. I would have then felt worse than before. This vicious circle was the story of my life for too many years.
I feel immensely proud of what I have achieved so far. I don't just mean the physical weight loss but also my state of mind. I see food totally differently now. It's taken a lot of determination and persistence, as well as bundles of loving support from friends and family. I used to look at cakes, chocolate, take-away and high calorie foods and salivate. Now when I see these foods I feel a bit sick. All I can see is the fat and think about the damage that it would do to my body. This is a revelation and I'm hoping that this new found thought stays with me.
What is funny now is watching other people. We went out for dinner the other day and we asked for 1/2 spit-roast chicken on it's own - then we load up on salad. The waitress seemed concerned that we didn't have anything to go with the chicken. We explained that we wanted to have salad, yet she was very keen for us to have a sauce to go with it. We declined and said that the salad bar would be sufficient. There are definitely some people who are shocked that the amount we eat is enough. The way in which the world sees food has changed dramatically over the past few decades and the world's weight is a direct consequence of that. I no longer want to be part of that statistic. I find myself watching programmes that explain how the world got so much bigger. I find it so interesting how food & beverage companies have had such an influence everyone. My husband and I used to eat takeaways and an embarrassing rate. We'd think nothing to eating a large Domino's pizza each and also share a chicken combo. I mean that just scares the hell out of me now. It must have been at least 2000 calories just for that. This doesn't even include the other food we'd consumed during the day.
I pray everyday that this is a change for life and that I can continue this fight forever. I am so much happier than I was 6 months ago. It's quite amazing how much losing 4 stones can affect your life. There are things I can do now that I just couldn't before. I was very much like those super morbidly obese people you see on the tv. Life is generally more difficult when you're bigger. I am always amazed when people say that they are happy when they are obese. Not because I don't think they look nice, but on a practical level, just putting on socks used to be an effort; being out of breath when you walk up a flight of stairs; not being able to keep up with friends on a walk out; not being able to see your toes etc. For anyone reading this who's been lucky enough to be pregnant, it's like the practicality of being pregnant....but all the time.....without the joy that pregnancy brings.
I have been contiually shocked and surprised by something other people have said to me over the last few months. It's something that I still can't get my head round. I have been told that I am an inspiration. I feel very honoured that people think this of me. At the end of the day I'm just a woman who has decided to fight, but let eveyone watch. I have to say that writing this blog has been so cathartic. I didn't dream that writing down all my thoughts and feelings could help, but it has.
My journey is only half way though and the changes so far have been immense. I have 2lbs to go until I get to the weight I've never been able to break through as an adult. Once I get through this it's all new territory. I'm looking forward to continuing on my journey and seeing the results of my hard work. Next week will mark the end of the first 6 months. I'm hoping to lose that 2lb by then, but we are going away for 8 days on Saturday. I will still be logging on though as we're taking our scales with us!
Thank you for joining me on this journey - I couldn't have done it without you xx
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